Sisters.

When I was a young I hated my twin sister.  I really hated her.  Stacy annoyed me and I spent most of my days asking God why he didn't make me an only child. 

After high school we attended separate colleges and something  changed. There was a void. Did I actually miss the very person that had bothered me all these years?  Stacy would come and visit me at Milligan.  I would cry when it was time for her to leave. I felt so empty as I watched her  pull out of my dormitory parking lot.



Rewind.  I was 11 years old.  It was summertime in London, England.   My whole family was having dinner at Pizza Express.  I remember like it was yesterday.  Mama: "Girls we have something to tell you."  "We're going to have a baby"  Was I in  a dream?  My parents waited until I was 11 to have another child?  Were they trying to ruin my life?  I didn't want another sibling.  I didn't care much for the one I had already.

My baby sister Sarah was born that December.  It was love at first sight.  She loved me.  Really loved me. And I was quite fond of her.  She made my every step for the first years of her life and I didn't mind a bit.  She slept with me, hung out with my friends and dressed like me.  Maybe having a baby sister wasn't that bad.  Actually,  I really liked it. 

God knows what we need in life.  And boy have I needed my sisters.

I truly admire the adults they have become.  Sarah and Stacy are my best friends.  They love me unconditionally.  And not a day goes by that I don't speak to one of them.

Stacy is sweet, and wise and a good communicator.  She is the most non judgmental person I know.  She has a zest for life and is totally hilarious.  Her walk with the Lord is something I try and model.

Sarah has grown up to be kind and confident.  She is extremely intelligent and caring.  She possess the ability to make a hard decision because it is the right decision.  (I was never really good at that)  She truly loves my kiddos.  She often texts me to tell me she is having a bad day and she needs a funny Kneisley girl story to make it better.  I love that!  (We have plenty of funny stories to tell about things that happen around this house!)

I have 4 daughters.  I can't begin to tell you how many comments I get on a regular day about not having a boy.  Maybe I just don't know what I'm missing but I don't care one bit.  I am forever grateful that my girls will know the blessing of sisterhood.  There is nothing like it.....

So when Anna, Brynn Caroline and Aubrey have fought all day (Yes!  Aubrey is in the mix now. She holds her own like a champ.)  and I am ready to throw them out the window....  I smile and know that someday their relationship will be different and priceless.

A Hamster in a Wheel.

Although, there are many things I love about being a stay at home mom, there are many things I "struggle" with also.  I would say the thing that is bothering me the most at the current time is that I feel like a hamster in a wheel.  You can all picture it, a cute little hamster running its little heart out and getting nowhere.  Many days that's me and I hate it.

I mop the kitchen floor and in less than 30  minutes someone has spilled a sticky substance all over it.  I finish cleaning the kitchen up after a meal and it's time to start the next meal  or someone needs a drink and a snack.  With 4 kiddos someone is always hungry.  I finish changing Caroline's diaper, get her down from the changing table and take the diaper to the trash.  Upon re entering my house I hear a familiar little voice say "Mommy, I poop".  I pick up the playroom during nap time and it looks like the atomic bomb went off 20 minutes after the girls wake up.  I could go on and on.  But I won't. 

What I have been really convicted of lately is doing all the mundane tasks in my day for the Glory of the Lord.  Phil 2:14 "Do all things without grumbling or complaining"  Colossians 3:17 "And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father."  Does that mean I feel like doing this...certainly not but I am trying.   I am a work in progress.

So, thank you Lord that I picked up 10 different pairs of mostly odd socks out of the toy bin today.  At least I have 8 little feet to put them on.  So,  I will press on another day giving praise to my Lord and as my sister says, trying to stay of "struggle street."

I will admit one of my favorite times of my day is a night when I put all the kiddos to bed, pick up my house and sit in complete silence admiring its perfection.  I am a tired hamster by then.  I rest and get ready to jump back on the wheel the next day;)  With a thankful heart ...of course;)

Wow 2011...already? I survived 2010

I have to admit I think 2010 has been the fastest year of my life.  It' like I blinked for a brief moment and it is 2011.  Last year at this time I was getting ready for the arrival of my 4th baby girl Aubrey.  I was terrified at the thought of another child.  After all Caroline was only 13 months old.  I am happy to say we have survived and I learned alot along the way.  Aubrey will be one next month.

She is a ray of sunshine in our family.  The first few months started out a little rough...colic and crying but at 5 mos old my sweet baby girl started smiling and hasn't quit yet.  I have always said that God's plan is perfect.  however, humbly, I now admit I don't know if I truly believed it until now.  I look at our 4 perfect daughters and know that God had a plan.  A plan far bigger then I could have ever imagined.  It never hits me more then when I see them all sitting around the breakfast table together.

In 2010 I learned that kids don't need a bath everyday.  They don't need perfectly coiffed hair with enormous hair bows.  Sometimes It's best to stop what I'm doing and sit on the floor and play.  My husband will not die if the house is messy and neither will I.  God is sovereign.  God places people in your life for a season and He knows these people will be there when you really need them.  6 year olds can help out tremendously....you just have to ask them.  Girlfriends make life better.  My family will always love me despite my imperfections. Don't take a 16 month old a 2 month old and twin 6 year olds to the pool by myself---  it's too hard.  McDonald's drive thorough is a gift from God.  It's easier to take care of 4 children NOT pregnant than 3 children pregnant. When all hell (for lack of a better word) breaks loose have a dance party in the living room. Most of all I have learned that I am tougher than I thought and what doesn't kill me will make me stronger.